Monday, February 18, 2008

Action Comics 289 (Part 6): WHEN SUPERGIRL PLAYED CUPID

When last we read: Supergirl cleaned the fortress and then she and Superman flew into the future to attend a Christmas party hosted by the adult legionnaires. Because our heroes forgot to bring presents, they slipped out the back door to rustle something up. What could they be? Find out now in Part 6 of WHEN SUPERGIRL PLAYED CUPID!

It doesn't take our super pair more than a few moments to return with Christmas presents I know I'd like to get. It seems they went into outer space and found an anti-gravity meteor (who knew such a thing existed? I never learned about them in astronomy class. But then, my professor – a man named Johnny Mathis, I kid you not – was not super-powered and thus, probably hadn't personally searched all of space in the moments it takes to find one of them). Supes breaks it up into little pieces so each of the legionnaires can put a chunk in their belts. "You need only give mental commands, activating it, and you'll fly!" So not only are the meteors able to break the pull of gravity, but they do so only when given a mental command?

Wow. Just... wow. That is some cool meteor. If Johnny Mathis knew about this and didn't tell him I'm gonna be so ticked off. Bet that's what all those shuttle missions were about, too. Hubbel Telescope is probably looking for them as well. It's a conspiracy to keep ordinary people from having mentally-commanded anti-gravity belts! They're saving all the chunks for the superheroes who may some day materialize!

Back to the story. Everyone likes their present. But Supergirl has much more on her mind than mere meteors. She's got some matchmaking to do. First, she shows Superman a plaque that honors Saturn Woman for driving off space monsters. Then she whips out a second plaque that honors her for "...exceptional intelligence and loveliness!" (Loveliness? Really? They gave her a plaque for that? Is physical beauty still the only real accomplishment of a woman 1010 years into the future? Can you imagine giving Batman a plaque for craggy handsomeness or Superman for good grooming? Loveliness. Oh, man.)

Superman responds to the plaques with "She must be quite a gal." Doesn't he already know her really well from his youth? He was in the Legion with her, for crying out loud. He already knows she's "quite a gal." Perhaps it's temporary amnesia brought on by searching for anti-gravity meteors.

Saturn Woman enters the room giving Superman a va-va-vooom moment (why is she touching her breast? That tease). He says he never dreamed she'd grow up to be such a spectacular beauty. (So... he considered her hopelessly ugly as a teenager? Perhaps he thought she'd peaked at 18 and there was nowhere to go but down. Whatever he thought of her, she's a mind-reader so she knew all about his low opinion. Or I could be wrong he thought she'd grow up to be a beauty, but just not a spectacular beauty. If so, his thoughts probably weren't all that offensive. And now, back to the story.) Pleased that Superman is attracted to Saturn Woman's nationally recognized loveliness, Supergirl sets a mistletoe trap (and that's why it's Christmas, of course! I should've seen that one coming).

And then come two panels I would've loved as a little girl, had I owned this story then. (I'm actually relating this story to you from an 80 page giant because I sold my copy of the original. This is an all Supergirl giant, Adventure Comics 390 from Mar-Apr 1970. My copy is, of course, coverless. A low grade collector such as myself never balks from a coverless book as long as the stories are intact. Anyway, my point is that I can't believe I missed buying this giant when I was a kid because 80 pages of Supergirl fun, excitement and romance is something I would never have passed by. I really missed out.)

Superman gives Saturn Girl a big smooch and by gosh and by golly, the lad likes it. In fact, he likes it so much, he gives her another. Supergirl is overjoyed. She immediately builds these two kisses into wedding bells. Saturn Woman doesn't appear to be fighting it, either. Could Supergirl have found the perfect match? Ooh, la la! With all these liplocks, she may just have succeeded!

How will you find out? Looks like you'd better come back Wednesday for Part 7 of WHEN SUPERGIRL PLAYED CUPID!

1 comment:

F.S. said...

Is that anti-gravity mistletoe?